Sunday, February 8, 2009

Genital exams!!

Depending on who you are, you get to spend 4 semesters of medical school either looking forward to, or dreading the day in 5th semester that you do your genital exams! Personally, I had mixed feelings about them. On the one hand, it's a sign that you're a 5th semester student, doing exams that lower semesters definitely are not allowed to do. On the other (more prominent, in my case) hand, you have to do a genital exam!

My first exam was with a female professional patient (there are three women that fly to the island for the occasion). We have to interview the patient, do a breast exam, and then a genital exam. We learned how to use a speculum and do the exam the morning of the actual exam, and then did it on a real person in the afternoon. The patient we had was actually extremely helpful and showed us exactly what we were supposed to be doing. If we were unsure of something or weren't doing something exactly right, she let us know and then showed us the right way. I hope I don't have to do another pelvic exam for some time, but at least I know how to do one when the time comes, which I have no doubt it will.

The next day, we had our male exam, which was a breast, genital, and rectal / prostate exam. The guy we had for this exam was also very helpful and did a lot of teaching. He showed us exactly what we were supposed to be seeing, put our fingers exactly where they were supposed to be, and again, made me feel comfortable that I could do it again, when I have to. He spent much of the time smiling and making jokes, but he clearly did not enjoy the rectal exam portion, which was by far the shortest. When we got there, he made it clear that we were not to be smiling, laughing, or making jokes. Of course, this was not something I'd want anyone making jokes about either, so serious it was.

Apparently, the guys get about $30 per student to be a professional patient. I'm not sure what the females get. They also get a free vacation out of the deal. Is $30 enough to allow a student access to certain areas of my anatomy? I'd have to say definitely not. But, in the end (no pun intended), it's probably not a terrible gig for some people. The patients seem to really enjoy the job, overall, although they clearly like some parts more than others.

3 comments:

Vince said...

I've said it before, and I'll say it again: Something went HORRIBLY wrong between you and your High School guidance counselor if you find yourself writing "professional genital exam patient" on the old "occupation" line!

Trixie the Pixie said...

HAHAHAHAHAHA.

The professional patients ARE a little strange, though. Our guy wanted us to perform his rectals in order of hand size. So, guess who got the privilege of going first?

Scott said...

I'm sure you had the same guy as us...I was third. The last guy had sausage fingers and got double lube. The patient didn't think that was as funny as I did.